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Love Letters Boxset Volume 1: Bonus content included Page 6


  Alright, kid, I’m stumped. Either you’re missing words in that last riddle, or the answer is really hidden. Cause I’ve got squat.

  I’m coming, Tommy, real soon.

  When I get there, your mom’s gonna have some explaining to do. She’s also going to learn what it means to have a real man by her side. I won’t let anything happen to her. That’s a promise you can hold me to. I want you both safe. With me around, you’ll never feel like Jack can take you. Not on my watch.

  Hang tight, kid.

  Soldier man

  A deep breath releases from me, and I know things will be okay. Mom will be happy, I’ll have a dad, and Gage will have a home.

  We’ll be a family.

  “Down, down, down!” Killian is yelling at Steele and Des as the military attacks our camp. With a blade in my hand, I’m stealthily making my way around the hut Killian is trapped in to shock and awe the bastard holding the automatic that’s shooting at my captain.

  It was bad enough we had to witness the horrors in the village these sons of bitches had destroyed. But having them come to our grounds? Un-fucking called for.

  I hear the ratatatat as I approach from the side and take the asshole off guard by tackling him to the ground and gutting his ass.

  “Got him!” I yell in to Killian, who comes running out with a rifle in hand and his 9mm strapped to his thigh.

  As gunfire blasts our way, we both scramble to take cover. An intense burn flashes through my bicep as I dive back behind crates full of supplies and wetness trails down my arm.

  “Lou, you’re hit!” Des comes running over, pulling out ace bandages as he moves.

  “Thanks, Tips.” My voice is laced heavily with sarcasm. “How many of these assholes are there?”

  “Drones are coming.” His answer pisses me off, but before I can say anything, I feel the adrenaline that had been present slowly drain from my system.

  “What the fuck?” My body is going limp as I try moving around. My ears begin to ring, and the explosions happening around us are like percussion drums going off in my head.

  Steele and Des each grab an arm and haul me to my feet, but I don’t feel like I’m moving. My world is spinning. Darkness fields my vision as my team drags me out of harm’s way, and all I can think about is my family.

  How I didn’t get to read Paisley’s last letter before shit turned to hell.

  Dear Gage,

  I’m sorry. I’m scared.

  Of life, of love. Men. My son hating me. Failing.

  I feel like I could have this wonderful life if only I were strong enough to reach out and grab hold of it. I can feel it slipping through my fingers, and yet, I can’t seem to catch onto it.

  Tommy is growing up so quickly, and if I don’t watch every moment, I’m going to miss everything. He talks about you, you know. You’ve been so good for him, Gage.

  I’m going to believe in your promises. I’m going to believe in you.

  We’re waiting for you.

  Yours, Paisley

  I didn’t get to make them mine.

  “That son of a bitch,” I growl for probably the eighth time in as many minutes. Tommy is back to being angry and confused. Anything to mask his pain.

  We haven’t heard from Gage in over a month. I knew I shouldn’t have trusted him. He’s like every other man in my life. Telling nothing but lies. Making false promises. Building dreams, only to dash them away with the first opportunity.

  I hate him!

  Pounding on the dough for the homemade pizza I’m hoping will sooth some of my son’s temper, I realize I’ve overdone it and must start again. It’s not until I feel dampness on the tops of my hands that I realize I’m crying.

  Not just for Tommy.

  For myself.

  For the life I’d begun to hope for. For the deceit I’d let him weave around me when I knew better. “Dammit!” I yell into the quiet room. My frustration and hurt getting the best of me.

  The ringing of the phone startles me into screaming as my heart beats out of control. Once calm, I pick up the receiver. “Hello?”

  “Miss Anderson?” It’s Tommy’s counselor. I really don’t like the woman.

  “Yes?” I try to inject happiness in my tone in the hopes my child hasn’t done something else.

  “I’m afraid we need you to come to school. Tommy has punched another student.” I can feel the judgment bleeding through her tone as she relays the information to me.

  “I’ll be right there.”

  I drag my feet after hanging up, the same way Tommy does when he’s in trouble or doesn’t want to do something.

  * * *

  Tommy

  I made Mom mad again. She doesn’t even care why I punched stupid Andrew in the face. He needs to keep his big mouth shut.

  “I just don’t understand, Tomas. Why is hitting someone your only solution?” I can’t look at her. I’m so mad at her and Gage. I don’t know what she did, but he stopped writing to us.

  I thought we were finally going to be normal again. That we would have a family like everyone else.

  I hate Gage. He tossed me to the side. He made me promises and then broke them.

  “Tomas?” Mom’s voice is sad as she drives us home.

  “What?” I snap out angrily.

  “Why did you hit him?” It’s the same question everyone’s been asking me.

  “He called me a bastard, okay!” I yell at her. Briefly, I see the hurt in her eyes as I rage at her, but I don’t care. “It’s your fault!” I can’t stop myself from blaming her.

  “What? How is it my fault?” She turns as she parks the car in front of our house.

  “You didn’t marry Jack! You were stupid and selfish, and you gave up on me!” When tears stream from her face, I push the regret I feel at my words back and storm out the car, racing to the backyard and the treehouse Mom bought me last summer.

  Blocking the door shut, I collapse against the mountains of pillows she put in here so I would have somewhere to relax when I play my games.

  I was never this angry all the times Jack hadn’t shown up. I don’t understand why I am with Gage. He’s just another person to leave me behind.

  I should be used to it.

  Landing on American soil again wrested a bittersweet feeling throughout me. I’m glad to be home, but I’m angry I haven’t been able to garner five minutes to get in contact with Paisley and Tommy before just showing up on their doorstep.

  I’m pissed I was fucking shot during that last firefight. The brachial artery in my bicep had been nicked, and I’d been airlifted to the nearest base for immediate medical attention. I’d nearly died and realized just how important my new family was to me.

  My plans had always been to sign up for another tour after this one; I was going to be a lifer. Like my dad and granddad before me. It’s funny how one life-changing moment can alter a person’s perspective.

  I’m retiring from active duty, but not leaving the service. Desk work will be boring as fuck, but once I convince Paisley to forgive me, because I know she’s going to think I abandoned them, it’ll be worth the transition.

  Seeing the way Killian’s girl reacted to seeing him after radio silence from the explosion, gave me hope that maybe Paisley and Tommy won’t hate me. That they could forgive me, too.

  I stop at a sports store on my way to their house for some new fishing gear for Tommy, and then a florist for as many yellow daisies as I can for Paisley. I don’t expect the gifts to soften them towards me but rather for them to know I couldn’t stop thinking about them.

  It’s mid-afternoon, and I’m hoping they’re both home from school by now. As I pull up to their house, an address I had Steele track down for me, I see her. She’s a thousand times more gorgeous than I ever imagined. Her soft blonde hair is up in a messy bun, and she looks unhappy and infuriated at the same time. That could be because of the douchebag standing on her front steps that she’s currently yelling at.

  Jack.

&
nbsp; He’s the only one they’ve told me about having any problems with. Stepping down from my pickup, I cross the street, ready to tell this son of a bitch to piss off, when her startled eyes meet mine. I hadn’t sent her a picture of me, so I don’t know how she recognizes me, but she does.

  “Gage.” She’s nearly breathless as tears pool in her gold eyes, and she walks away from Jack and down the steps.

  I ignore the other man as she stops in front of me, amazement and wonder shine in the pools of her eyes. An electric pull has me gripping her hip in one hand while the other latches onto the back of her neck, pulling her into my body as I lean down towards her.

  “Paisley,” I murmur against her lips before taking possession of them. They’re soft like silk. She’s delicate like spun glass. When her hands reach for my biceps with a tightening grip, I know we’ll be okay in time.

  Our tongues tangle right there in the street, and a blast of kinetic energy races through me when she moans my name. She steps closer, melding our bodies together, and only the thought of her bastard ex pulls me free from the trance she’s weaved around us.

  “What the fuck is this shit?” He roars, and I hear his steps getting closer.

  I have to tear my lips from hers, only to see a dazed look in her honey eyes. Nipping her bottom lip, I tell her, “Later, Paisley.” I love the sound of her name falling from my mouth.

  She bites the same lip I just did and nods her head, turning to face Jack.

  “Who the hell is this, Paisley?” The other man snarls.

  Before she can answer, I step forward, my body ready to tangle. “I’m her fucking man. What the hell do you want?”

  Amusement replaces his anger. “She ain’t got no man. I’d have known.”

  “That ‘cause you’re stalking her?” For fifteen years, I’ve been in hell on earth, I know how fuckers like him think.

  “No,” he blusters, “she and Tommy never mentioned some has-been soldier in their lives.” His eyes wash over my uniform in disdain.

  “Has-been?” My laughter is harsh in his face. Filled with malice, not amusement. He’s uneasy on his feet now. Good. “If a has-been means protecting my country, then sure I am. Care to tell me why you put your hands on my girl? Ever think they didn’t tell you about me because they knew you’d get meaner, really fill out your pansy-ass shoes, and show your true colors as a woman beater? Did it ever occur to you that they would have a protector? Someone who would come back and beat you into the ground like you deserve?”

  Shock renders him speechless for a moment, and I can see my threat has him thinking through his response. “That’s my kid. You can’t keep me from him.” Pussy.

  “I don’t need to. Tommy can make his own choices. But let me tell you something now. If you ever want to see him from here on out, it’ll go through me. You will never have contact with Paisley again.” This wuss will never touch my woman again.

  “You can’t do that,” he snaps.

  “I can. And I will. You will see, as soon as they say yes, I’ll be adopting Tommy as my own. Which means I get all the say. This is my family, not yours. You gave up any rights you might have ever had the moment you bitched out and ran away. They’re mine now.” I snarl in his face to drive the point home.

  “You can’t do that unless I give up rights.” His voice is uncertain.

  “You’re not on the birth certificate, Jack. Tomas is mine.” Paisley speaks up from beside me, her little hand slipping into mine with a firm grip.

  Wrapping an arm around her shoulder, I kiss her temple before turning my glare back on the asshole. “From this day forward, it will be solely Tommy’s choice to see you. Any and all contact will go through me. If I ever find out you’ve gone behind my back to harass either of them, I will end you, Jack.”

  “Is that a threat?” His chest puffs out like he could do something to me.

  I step forward so we’re nose to nose and murmur, “It’s a fucking promise. I will make you disappear.” Menace laces my voice.

  Shooting us each a glare, he walks away pissed off, but I think I’ve driven the point home. After Paisley informed us that Jack wasn’t on Tommy’s birth certificate, it was one of the few things I hadn’t been able to get off my mind. Of course, I’d meant to talk to her in private before announcing it.

  * * *

  Paisley

  He’s here. I can’t help the sigh that leaves my lips. Gage came. My bickering with Jack was getting on my nerves, then out of nowhere, he was there. Watching, waiting. My body sang. I don’t know how I knew it was Gage, I just innately did.

  He’s huge, easily a foot taller than me. With dark brown hair and the warmest chocolate brown eyes I’ve ever seen.

  When he kissed me, I nearly melted. I experienced everything he said he’d been feeling in his last few notes. The longing and uncertainty. The relief to be in his arms.

  The way he told Jack off, claimed my son and me without a thought, it made the distance and silence vanish. I was no longer angry at him. I knew he had a reason for losing touch.

  “Are you okay?” His hands on my neck are soft.

  “You’re here,” I whisper in awe.

  His smile, dimples on both cheeks, reaches his eyes to crinkle in the corners. They shine with happiness. “I told you I was coming for you, Paisley.” His smile dims. “I’m just sorry it took me so long to get here.”

  Looking down at the reminder, I resolve myself to ask him, “What happened?” Afraid of the answer. Emotion making my voice crack.

  “Oh, Paisley,” he lifts my chin, “sweet as a fucking Daisy.” Our lips meet in a small kiss. Our foreheads touch as he pulls back slightly. “There was an attack.” My eyes widen in shock. “We barely made it out. I was shot– “

  “Are you alright?” I interrupt before he can finish.

  “It was touch and go for a bit, but I am now. After debriefings and recovery, we were always on the go. I’m truly sorry I couldn’t get in touch. I would never abandon you two, and I know you were both thinking I did.”

  “But you’re okay?” I can’t seem to focus on anything other than he was shot and could have died, and we never would have known what happened to him. My heart is pounding so heavily I can see my shirt rise and fall.

  His arms wrap around me in comfort. He embraces my panic. “I’m not going back, Paisley.” My body freezes at his words. “I realized I could have lost you guys before I ever got to have you, and I won’t risk that again. I’m retired from active duty and saddled to a desk.” He leans back to look me in the eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, ever again, baby.”

  It’s with that reassurance that we go pick Tommy up from his friend’s. Gage intent on fulfilling every promise he made to us both and proving he’s in it for the long haul.

  * * *

  Tommy

  “Tommy! Your mom’s here.” Cassie’s mom yells for me as we’re playing in her backyard.

  “Oh man. I was supposed to be able to stay all day!” Smacking the dirt off my knees, I sulk as I walk to the front door, Cassie right behind me. “Mom, you said–” I pause when I see a man with her.

  The next thing I know heavy arms are wrapped around me, tears are streaming down my face, and he’s whispering in my ear, “I’m sorry, kid. So damn sorry.”

  “You didn’t write me back! You left us!” I scream, trying to pound my tiny fists against his chest. It just hurts so bad.

  “Hey,” he pulls away to grip my cheeks in both his huge hands, “it won’t ever happen again. I ain’t going nowhere now.”

  “You promised,” I say weakly. I hear Mom sniffle and see she’s crying, too. I’ve said some really mean things to her lately.

  “My promise is my bond, kiddo. I’m here to stay.” I look back at Gage; I want to believe him.

  “What happened?” I ask. I need to know why he abandoned me, too.

  “Let’s go home and talk about it, sweetheart.” Mom looks a mess.

  “See you later, Cassie!” I call as we wal
k out to Gage’s truck.

  Contentment flows through me as I watch Paisley hustle around the kitchen making Tommy’s favorite, homemade pizza. Apparently, the kid can’t get enough of it.

  “Okay, how ‘bout this one… When's the best time to go to the dentist?” Tommy smiles like he’s got me beat.

  I’ve got this one figured out, however. “Tooth hurty?”

  “Darn it!”

  “I got one for you, master riddler. What do you call a sad strawberry?” I ask.

  “A blueberry!” Paisley answers.

  “Mom!” Tommy groans.

  I can’t help laughing at the glare he shoots her way. This kid is damn adorable. I couldn’t be more satisfied than I am right now when they both burst out laughing.

  “It’s the only one I know.” She grins at us but continues kneading the dough.

  Watching her move around the room and joking with Tommy, it’s all I’ve ever wanted in life. They complete me in a way I never understood until now.

  Tommy may not be my blood, but he was damn sure mine. Just as soon as I could make it happen. Paisley and I have a lot of getting to know each other to do, but we have years to figure that out.

  While the pizza cooks, we sit outside on her small deck and play cards. Simple, yet everything. We seemed to have found an effortless fit with the three of us. I’m sure there’s going to be learning curves. There will be times where I need to back off because they’re so used to their independence, and there are going to be times they need to understand I’ll take the reins. That I’m not going anywhere.

  * * *

  Paisley

  We’ve just put Tommy down for the night, and I’m still unsure I’m not dreaming. I expect to roll over and wake up to my alarm any minute now.

  Gage exhausted him, playing every game my son wanted to. Not once did it enter his mind he could say no. Better yet, he wanted to spend time with the eager boy. Seemed to really enjoy playing catch, showing him how to properly bait his fishing rod. They even wrestled in the front yard while I cleaned the kitchen after dinner.